Keeping score is for sports.
If you enjoy this or it resonates with you, consider supporting me as an independent writer by sharing it and becoming a paid subscriber for just $6/mo, Thank you.
As a child I loved to be the one responsible for keeping score, whether we were playing mini golf or skittles in our living room, I was the one keeping score.
Keeping score is fine, and even essential when you are playing games or participating in sports, but keeping score in a marriage is both inappropriate and destructive.
Whenever we keep score we naturally create winners and losers. Which is okay when you are talking about the Super Bowl, but there shouldn’t be winners or losers in marriage. We shouldn’t be competing and comparing our efforts and contributions to those of our spouse.
Husbands and wives, mothers and fathers, men and women each have different talents, skills, roles and contributions. Each is needed and necessary to make a relationship and family vibrant and successful.
The role of a mother is not more or less important than that of a father. A man's innate attributes are as essential as a woman’s. When we start to keep score we begin implying or explicitly saying that our contributions are more valuable and useful than our spouses.
This approach will always lead to resentment and contention in marriage and is destructive. Instead of comparing, we should compliment our spouse for their unique character and contributions.
Book Club
Do you like to read and discuss non-fiction, or is it a goal of yours to read more? If so, participate in my monthly book club! It’s all online so you can participate in the weekly discussions anywhere in the world. You can view the reading list and schedules for free, but to participate in the weekly discussion threads, you’ll need to become a paid subscriber for just $6/mo… I look forward to hearing your insights!
Participate in the discussion today!
