I didn’t realize how much society and our culture connected my career with my identity until I didn’t have one. I left what I thought was going to be my dream career in 2021 and since then I have renovated and sold a house, moved across America, travelled for six months, started a business and dabbled in handyman work, office work and a whole lot of time trying to figure life out and next steps. It’s a tricky question to answer when people ask me what I do for work, and it is often one of the first questions people ask me. The truth is, for all the good that has happened these past 4-years, there’s also been a lot of personal insecurity, self-doubt and a sense of feeling lost and stuck. At times I have wondered if I am broken, defective, useless. Intellectually I think I know these things aren’t true, but this doesn’t always stay the tide of thoughts and feelings that flood over me sometimes. I think immediately asking what someone does for work is a bad question, especially when there are so many other good questions to ask. One best and broadest might be simply asking “Tell me about yourself” and allowing them to disclose the information they are comfortable sharing with an acquaintance or newly found friend.
-Matthew Royston
From my home in Almost Heaven, xo
