Wandering in the woods
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Cassandra and I usually switch off each night between putting our boys or girls to bed. Tonight I had our daughters and so after dinner I decided to take them for a walk. It was golden hour as we walked through the woods and along some trails.
As we were walking my mind started wandering. I caught myself and wondered why I would allow my mind to wander from this near perfect moment with my daughters.
I struggle being in the present moment and enjoying it fully. As I was walking up a hill behind my daughters this thought came into my mind.
Satan wants us to regret the past, Christ tells us that our past has been redeemed.
I have wondered if one of the adversaries great assaults on the faithful is to magnify our sins and shortcomings of the past and replay them over to remind us what monsters we are and how undeserving we are of enjoying the present moment. He tells us that we can’t enjoy today because of the mistakes we made yesterday. If satan can convince us to live in our past, however dark or delightful, he wins. He wins by robbing us of the Joy Christ promises us today.
Christ doesn’t condone the sins and mistakes of yesterday but from what I have been taught and understand, he doesn’t desire us to weaponize them or demonize ourselves either. No matter the problems of yesterday, the call today is to try again.
Satan similarly whispers that the future is to be feared. Uncertainty can make even the best of us feel uneasy and I think Lucifer doesn’t waste any time capitalizing on this. Why enjoy today when tomorrow it could all be over. It’s like never blowing up a balloon and enjoying it today because tomorrow it might get popped.
When we live in the past and fear the future, we fail to follow Christ’s admonition to let our hearts not be troubled or to be afraid.
Christ has invited us to follow him, look unto him and learn of him. None of these endeavors can be achieved yesterday or tomorrow, they can only be accomplished today, in the very moment we are experiencing. Only today, right now can I look, follow and learn.
Learning to live in the present is not easy. At least it has proved very difficult for me, but it is something that I try to remind myself to do when I catch myself wandering in my mind as I am wandering in the woods on a sunny spring evening with my daughters.
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